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April 1, 2019

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Stop Hiding and Start Healing

April 11, 2019

 

Sometimes, life is just hard.  It can be so hard that we hide to survive, but eventually there comes a point when we know there is no more running.  

 

I’m sure you’ve heard the saying, “Feelings buried alive never die.”  Never was this truer for me than it was last year.  Although middle age brought the joy of caring less what people think, it also deepened the sorrows I’d carried around for so long. 

 

There came a point when I knew I could no longer continue carrying around my secret shame.  The shame of the one thing I knew people would judge me for.  The thing that made me feel unworthy and unlovable for most of my formative years.  The thing that influenced my life in countless ways.  The thing that carried so many of its own secrets, that even thinking about it brought feelings of disgrace. 

 

I know you understand these feelings.  There are not any of us who’ve made it through life unscathed.  We all have our secrets.  I don’t believe we need to air our dirty laundry to heal but there does come a point when we need to stop hiding, even if it’s just to stop hiding from ourselves.  We’ll know it’s time to stop hiding when our secrets hunt us down in our thoughts, our dreams, in the people we meet, and in the actions we take. 

 

When you are ready, I encourage you to seek that which will be most helpful.  It might be coaching, it might be counseling, it might be reconciling, it might be finally forgiving someone, it might be relinquishing the expectation for an apology you will never receive.  Whatever it is that will help you move beyond it, do it.   

 

As you begin your journey, remember that your reactions make a difference to your progress and healing.  If you engage in self-recrimination and self-loathing, you will stall your progress.  If you exercise self-compassion, you will propel yourself forward.  Always keep in mind that you are doing the difficult work so that you can be a better and stronger you. 

When you come out on the other side, you will have a treasure.  A treasure you can share with other people that honors your victory and blesses the lives of others. 

 

Are you ready to begin your journey?  Are you ready to stop hiding and start healing?

 

Click here to read about my healing journey. 

 

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